您希望自己的生活吗？充分利用现实的六个技巧

We must deal with our current reality, challenges and all—but we can make it the best reality possible with these six tips.

By Anabel Jensen – October 14th, 2020

曾几何时，当我十几岁的时候，我记得对自己说：“我希望下周。我会拥有我的人文老师多德夫人分配的自传。我希望明天。然后，我害怕的钢琴演奏会结束。是的！我希望下个月。我不想花三月的时间来研究世界的主要哲学。”

Then one day I had an epiphany. I was staring at the calendar and thinking about those wishes and I realized that–if by some unknown magic, my fairy godmother had granted them, I would have lost five weeks and one day of my life.

I would have missed my good friend being crowned homecoming queen. She was so surprised and thrilled. I would have missed the birth of the new pinto colt, which dad had promised me would be mine. I would have missed my grandmother’s 60Th生日聚会。一定有50名亲戚出席，巧克力蛋糕很棒。

即使在具有挑战性的时期，也可以做到最好的回忆。

目前 - 我们中的许多人都在做出类似的愿望：我希望这种爆炸的病毒能消失。我希望COVID-19限制结束。我希望一切都能恢复正常。我希望我不必社交距离。我希望我不必戴口罩。如果我再洗手一次，他们将溶解。

记住这些古老的格言：如果愿意是马，每个人都会骑。也许您的母亲或祖母可能会说：如果愿意是鱼，每个人都会吃。取而代之的是，我们必须处理现实，但是我们可以使其成为最好的现实。

我感觉到我经历过的最强烈的感觉。

恐惧，焦虑，孤独，disappointment, anger, and even rage. Tasks which should be easy and fun have another side—hard and scary. For example, school should be easy and fun. Teachers have been working diligently to teach the necessary skills (i.e., social distancing, hand sanitizing, and mask wearing, etc.) currently needed to allow the return to the school building safe in a fun, game-like approach. However, even knowing the correct science doesn’t negate our feelings—and our outside feelings of excitement and joy do not eliminate our inside feelings of fear and frustration.

因此，为了帮助处理这些感觉，您可能一直在压制或填充这些感觉，这里有六个（六秒钟）的活动，以充分利用您当前的现实：现金网赌钱网站

Six Tips to Make the Best of Your Current Reality

1.“命名为驯服”

Use the “name it to tame it tool.” This phrase was coined by psychiatrist Daniel Siegel (2010). When your body (headache, neck ache, stomach twisting, knee twitching, etc.) informs your brain you are having a strong emotional reaction to something, put it into words. Describe the feeling with as many words as possible. Or, create a analogy—such as I feel as if I just fell off my bike and my stomach hurts. When you use this phrase and do this activity, research by Goleman (1995) shows that the amygdala (the storage bin in the brain for emotions) cools down and you can then function more effectively and you can think more clearly.

2. set a feelings goal

设定目标，以确保您在10-15分钟，一个小时或一天结束时想要感觉的目标。我们中的许多人都不认识到我们可以通过设定特定目标来改变情绪。然后决定要创建要产生的感受的两件事。例如，您可能会发短信给朋友，听一些音乐，或进行五分钟的剧烈运动。

3.热可可呼吸

做“热可可呼吸。”假装您的手里有一杯热可可 - 喝热喝。呼吸-1、2、3。然后呼吸1、2、3。离开。对于年龄较大的学生和成人，您可以将计数更改为5或8。

4.意大利面姿势

练习从假装是一块未煮过的意大利面条（像木板一样拧紧 - 尽可能僵硬）转变为煮熟的意大利面条（从脚趾的尖端放松到头顶放松 - 记住了这些眉毛）。

5.建立安全的地方

Use your imagination and build a safe, comfortable place in your brain to visit to smooth out the rough edges of your feelings. Maybe you build a fort in your favorite tree in the backyard. Maybe you remember being on the beach in Hawaii—with the warm water lapping at your toes. What can you hear? What can you smell? Maybe you remember zipping down a snow-packed hill in Tahoe on your bright red skis. What do you see? Is the sun too bright? Do you need your goggles? In your head, you can design, build, and visit a towering castle or view a spectacular vista—a place to catch your breath, decompress, and self-soothe.

6.“焦虑”你的情绪

编造“新单词”来描述您的感受。哈佛和谷歌的研究人员在2010年估计，英语中有超过一百万个单词。当然，其中一些是古老的，有些是语，有些是同一词的另一种形式。在第二版的《牛津英语词典》中，至少有600,000个单词确定和定义。大多数讲英语的成年人的词汇量为20,000至35,000个单词。有趣的是，只有大约3000个单词与情感和感受有关。如果您不知道自己的感受，那就一起来。也许有一天会添加到字典中。您可能需要先画或画出自己的感觉，然后标记它。例如，您欣赏您的小弟弟，但发现他令人沮丧。 Perhaps your new word would be a combination of admiration and irritating: “admiritating.” Perhaps your homework is intriguing and anxiety producing. Your new word might be: “anxietriging.”

希望您能找到这一简短的想法和活动清单。在评论中给我留言并分享最有用的东西，没有什么。

Perhaps you created an activity of your own and are willing to share with the community.

我很乐意将其传递给其他人。

Love,

Anabel